Leader-Ship as an Empathy-Based Sharing-Caring-Ship of Partnered Ethical-Ecological Teaching and Mentor Shipping

Pınar Üstündağ-Algın, Ankara Yıldırım Beyazıt University
Hatice Karaaslan, Ankara Yıldırım Beyazıt University
Tim Murphey, Visiting Professor, Research Institute for Learner Autonomy Education (RILAE), Kanda University of International Studies

Üstündağ-Algın, P., Karaaslan, H. & Murphey, T. (2022). Leader-Ship as an Empathy-Based Sharing-Caring-Ship of Partnered Ethical-Ecological Teaching and Mentor Shipping. Relay Journal, 5(2), 87-98. https://doi.org/10.37237/relay/050203

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Abstract

A sharing community cares for those involved and shares material and non-material caregiving and learning. We would like to propose that we as educators concentrate more of our efforts toward sharing, caring, and “shipping” (acting) rather than dominating, controlling, and testing. Below we recognize several authors, researchers, programs, and activities that have already started types of “Share-Care-Shipping” without naming it as such, and we offer our own examples as well. Pınar and Hatice describe how they have inspired the caring actions of student-mentors at a university in Turkey who have developed into more helpful and caring people along with their peers. Tim has attempted to see how students in online classes in Japan during the last few years of the pandemic have been able to teach others (family and friends) important things they learned in class. He shares their case studies of caring-teaching stories.   

Keywords: leadershipping, partnering, sharing and caring, student mentorship, peer teaching

Authors’ Note

We hope you will play along with our putting “-ing” on the end of nouns that need to be seen as moving processes rather than fixed objects (Murphey, 2014). We would also like you to consider placing the teaching community into the caring communities (self-care, childcare, healthcare, nature-care, climate-care, community-care, and student-care/caring). 

Anthropologist Riane Eisler (2000), in Tomorrow’s Children, makes a beautiful case for “partnering” rather than dominating our students, children, mates and coworkers. Similarly, in our experience, we have playfully added “ship” and “shipping” to match with the term “leadership,” which unfortunately has not yet been given the positive push of “ing-ing” itself (Murphey, 2014) into a more active gerund as it should be, i.e., “leadershipping” (We will let readers determine the differences between “leading” and “leadershipping”).

Eisler (1987) has captured well in her many books the domineering vs. partnering model that humanity has long been dealing with. Throughout history, humans have mostly been domineering and occasionally partnering. Domineering often involves physical, social and psychological violence and can even dominate the dominator’s mind. With the stress of these recent pandemic years, this tendency to dominate may have become even graver. But there have been times in humanity when partnering was more normal and accessible, especially when the female side of our species was able to lead and be more in control of governing issues. While males are usually the ones who wage war and females the ones who argue for peace, there have also of course been violent women and peaceful men in history. Anthropologists have shown us that peaceful times and customs happened on nearly every continent at different times in history (Eisler, 1987). 

A number of researchers have also reached the conclusion that caring connections with others are extremely important for our general health and well-being as well as the planet’s (Anholt, 2020; Hamel & Zanini, 2020; Hari, 2018; Murthy, 2020; Paul, 2021; Pilling, 2014; Porath, 2016). In music, Jason Mraz’s “I’m Yours” captures the idea that we can give ourselves and our caring to others in just a 3-minute song. The authors, who themselves believe in the limitless potential lying at the heart of this sharing-caring-shipping, will be describing more integrated ways of getting students to engage in caring and sharing. Below we first introduce a project in Turkey and then one in Japan.   

Student Mentorship Program at Ankara Yıldırım Beyazıt University (AYBU): Spreading Sharing and Caring (Pınar and Hatice in Turkey)

The Student Mentorship Program (SMP) in Ankara Yıldırım Beyazıt University (AYBU) was planned as a broader application of a tiny program Hatice conducted from May to November 2021 with two of her advisees (one 1st-year student as the mentor and one pre-1st-year as the mentee). She guided them to engage in online peer mentoring on study skills, departmental courses, campus life and rules, course registrations and extracurricular activities. With the broader perspective of potentially expanding into a school-wide project, Pınar joined the program as the second supervisor. As a proposal still in its piloting stage, the SMP in AYBU is intended to promote student well-being (Fredrickson & Branigan, 2005; Seligman, 2011) and contribute to a memorable campus experience with positive emotions in engaging spaces, strong relationships, purposeful and meaningful engagement and feelings of accomplishment. To this end, a student mentor’s (SM’s) job is to create, organize and run academic, social and cultural orientation and adaptation programs (and one-to-one mentoring sessions) that span the entire year for the new national and international students.

SMP requirements include (1) being a full-time undergraduate or graduate student at AYBU, (2) having no prior disciplinary record, (3) being able to participate in the mentor training and (4) being able to participate in the AYBU General Orientation Program. Upon recruitment, candidates are trained to become certified SMs by the program supervisors on a range of topics including motivation and resilience, emotional awareness and regulation, support systems, effective communication and relationship building, mediation, problem-solving and proactive thinking, social inclusion and ethical issues, leadership, agency, event organization, reflective practice, mentorship and program rules and regulations (See Appendix A for a more detailed outline as to what is taught to the candidates and Appendix B for a sample task).

This training content is aligned with the fundamentals of Social and Emotional Learning (SEL), which encourage learners to “develop healthy identities, manage emotions and achieve personal and collective goals, feel and show empathy for others, establish and maintain supportive relationships, and make responsible and caring decisions.” (CASEL, 2022, para. 1). Figure 1 displays a more detailed description of the five core areas of SEL competence. 

Figure 1. SEL Competence Areas 
Note. From Social and emotional learning (SEL) 101: Special edition building connections webinar, by the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL), 2021, slide 11 (https://casel.org/events/social-and-emotional-learning-sel-101/). Copyright 2021 by the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning.

The procedures in the piloting stage include:

• Exploring, learning about and reflecting on the concept of mentorship, related responsibilities and role definitions by engaging in supervisor-guided activities during online or face-to-face meetings and discussion sessions;
• Researching and preparing reports on campus life and rules, departmental courses and course registration, study skills, extracurricular activities, department-specific rules and regulations and all sorts of support systems made available at the university;
• Preparing documents or reports to be presented to various stakeholders.

In addition, candidates are required to exhibit the qualities of being approachable and friendly, act responsibly and respectfully, share their AYBU experiences, provide non-judgmental support, maintain contact and complete emergent tasks. They might work closely with their team and the mentees on a daily basis (excluding days off). They do not provide any degree of academic tutorial assistance, assessment advice and counseling, promote themselves as experts to their fellow students, review assignments or put themselves in vulnerable situations. This process of providing mentorship is aimed at equipping SMs with in-demand skills such as leadership, teamwork, problem-solving and communication. They also receive a certificate of appreciation from the university.

As of November 2021, there were 11 candidates in the pilot program, and their reflections below were collected for the purposes of this paper. They were required to write short reflective paragraphs (around 100 words) on some of their caregiving acts or care-receiving situations. (The students have given permission to use their names, and their texts were either translated from Turkish or revised for publication purposes.) Excerpts 1–6 come from mentees, and the last five are from mentors: 

Excerpt 1

When the schools started face to face again in October [2021], and I got the chance to meet my mentor face to face for the first time after 5 months of online peer-mentoring, I was so happy and relieved, and I felt like I quickly adapted to the physical environment and started to see it as a warm, welcoming place which [had] initially seemed cold and distant. She made me feel home at my school as I remembered our online engagement and how helpful she had been all the while. When I saw her at the cafeteria, I felt like I was in the company of someone I had known for years, like with a friend from my hometown. 

Ebru Dönmez, 1st-year student, Department of International Relations

Excerpt 2

I came to realize in my relationships, I feel responsible for the people once I establish a deep emotional connection with them. 

Zeynep Uymaz, pre-1st-year student, Department of International Relations

Excerpt 3

The mentorship program was a good experience for me because I learned to work as a team here, to help. I’ve also met some valuable people and been involved in activities. I’m proud to be here. 

İlayda Gözütok, pre-1st-year student, Department of Metallurgical and Materials Engineering

Excerpt 4

I generally like to watch movies. But when I don’t feel like watching movies or when I’m bored with something, I start watching one of my “comfort” movies. It makes me feel like I’m in my safety zone, just like the mentorship group I’m in. Whenever I need something or have something to ask, I consult them first. 

Efşan Yıldırım, pre-1st-year student, Department of International Relations

Excerpt 5

Ever since I was little, it’s been my dream to remind people that the world is a beautiful place, something we often forget. Now in the mentorship program, with my valuable supervisors and precious peers, I believe we will realize my dream by bringing our individual efforts together. As a student with a diverse cultural background, I believe I will contribute to the team [by drawing attention to the needs of international students]. We will welcome them and help them feel home in our compassionate ways. I have full confidence in our capacity, and I am lucky to be a part of this mentorship program. 

Liloz Hasso, pre-1st-year student, Department of International Relations

Excerpt 6

The student mentorship program has been really beneficial. All the meetings, workshops and tasks we had together were eye-opening experiences for me. We participated in a conference and ran a workshop with my teammates. Being in such an environment in the first year of my university life gave me self-confidence. I am very happy to have met my supervisors and my friends. 

Kader Taşar, 1st-year student, Department of Aerospace Engineering

Excerpt 7

There are several advantages of peer mentoring. It makes me happy to see I can guide my mentee about some important goals she can achieve even now, before she starts the departmental program as a pre-1st-year. I didn’t have that perspective as a pre-1st-year myself. The advantage for me, as the mentor, is taking on such responsibilities and learning from them. It is also an honor to have earned your trust to be invited as a mentor to this program. Walking in this path, under your secure guidance as our program supervisor, helps us tremendously. 

Edanur Doğan, 2nd-year student, Department of International Relations

Excerpt 8

When I feel down, I check the things in our student mentorship WhatsApp group, and I feel energized and happy again seeing the motivational messages or inspirational images. 

Turab Babadağ, graduate student, Department of Psychology

Excerpt 9

It is good to be in this program. I think that after some time, I can help a student with the things that I learned here. Also, this thought gives me hope, and because of that, I am trying to be a better student. We are so lucky to be in the mentorship program. 

Ayça Erciyas, 1st-year student, Department of Architecture

Excerpt 10

It is a great chance for us to connect with even graduate students from our departments, as they can guide us about the job opportunities and give us helpful tips. As an engineering student, although I am not that good at verbal expression compared to friends from other departments, I always feel ready to do my best as a mentor. Even though my experience is still limited, I am very excited to share my current experience with others. 

Çağlanur Yılmaz, 1st-year student, Department of Aerospace Engineering

Excerpt 11

From the movie [Music of the Heart, which we watched to become aware of and analyze the concept of mentorship], the most inspirational line to me was “Standing strong isn’t just about using your legs. You can stay strong inside. The important thing is that your heart is steady, not your feet.” I also think that a person’s inner power is more important to achieve things, to pursue goals. 

Hanin Alshohima, graduate student, Department of Management

SMs, as reflected in their voices in the excerpts, expressed their excitement, contentment and gratitude for being involved in this student mentorship experience. They were willing to further engage in this sort of “partnershipping,” mutual sharing and caring with a repeated focus on the affect, through team- and rapport-building activities and inclusive decision-making processes. 

Teaching Homework (Tim in Japan)

For many years Tim has been recommending his students to experience teaching their peers, family and friends what they were learning in classes as one of the best ways to learn it themselves and to write case studies about their experiences (Murphey, 2017, 2021a, 2021b). These benefits have been again confirmed by Paul (2021) and are also relevant to the SMP at AYBU. The experience of teaching others can help tutors become more fully integrated into an academic or professional community. The Summer Premed Program, operated out of the medical school of the University of California, Irvine, enlists African American and Latino/a medical students to teach college students who are themselves members of minority groups. The undergraduates, in turn, teach students from Irvine’s predominantly Black and Latino public high schools. Started in 2010, the program has been shown to enhance the self-confidence and motivation of all three tiers of students (Paul, 2021, p. 198).

At Christmastime 2021, the assignment in Tim’s Positive Sociology class was to choose something students had learned in class (e.g., the “COPS BEES” acronym for eight ways to reduce stress, as can be seen in Appendix C; seven ways of improvisation; three components of hope; or a song or two; Murphey, 2018), to teach it to a friend or family member as a Christmas gift and then to write the experience up as a short case study. PDFs of all the contributions were sent to the students in the new year. Below are two examples (all students gave permission to use their names):

Excerpt 12

I taught my cousin COPS BEES. She is a nurse, always busy with work and always looks tired. Therefore, I taught them to her on the 22nd and 23rd, when she came to visit me at home before Christmas. First, in order to know her mental state I asked her why she was tired and what she usually did to relieve it. It turned out that the cause of her fatigue was her work, and she didn’t know many good stress relievers. I then wrote “COPS BEES” in large letters on a piece of paper, explained it in detail, and advised her to try to practice it every day. Since I thought it would be difficult to practice all of them perfectly, I asked her what she would practice today, and told her to practice at least three of them perfectly. On the 24th, I asked her if she liked her Christmas present this year, and she said, “You gave me very good advice, and I’ll keep practicing it,” which made me very happy. 

Nonoka Kitaya, Dec 24, 2021, 10 p.m.

I wasn’t doing it as an assignment, but simply because I wanted to make my cousin’s life better, so it was a great assignment for me.

(Nonoka, 2 weeks later in her action log)

Excerpt 13

I taught three songlets to my Chinese friend. He is studying Japanese as his second foreign language. He should have questions about Japanese, but he rarely asks me questions because he doesn’t want to burden me. So at first I taught, “What is asking: Asking may be a moment’s embarrassment, not asking is a lifelong regret.” Then he soon understood this meaning, and he asked me a question: Why do Japanese people call green lights blue lights? It was a difficult question for me too. But I know the reason. So I told him that Japanese people are likely to describe green things as blue, such as vegetables and fruits, and it means fresh. I always talk with him in Chinese, but after I gave the advice to him I have used more Japanese in talking. Then he becomes able to easily ask me what I am saying. Yesterday he asked me a question again!

Second of all, I taught him, “Why do we laugh: 笑う門には福来る [warau kado ni wa fuku kitaru]; smiles brings you to happiness, let it show the way.” When he makes mistakes in a Japanese test or when he quarrels with friends, he soon gets angry and feelings become unstable. So I told him that it is important to laugh when you make a mistake or have a bad feeling. Laughing makes you feel good and gives you another chance. During the Christmas season, his feelings were stable and he didn’t have any test, so I could not check the result of the advice, but I hope that it will work well and help him to overcome difficulties in the future. Last of all, I taught him, “How do you succeed: ‘Doidagain’ (‘do it again’ × 8) Make many mistakes and doidagain.” As I said before, he is studying Japanese. Japanese particles are so difficult for him, so every time he made mistakes, I taught him the right use of particles for him. And I told him that you don’t need to hesitate to make mistakes. You can learn a lot of things from mistakes. Thanks to these songlets, he positively asks me questions and makes mistakes. I’m really glad to help him learn Japanese! 

Hiroto Iida, Dec 26, 2021, 7 p.m.

Conclusion (With a Glance Into the Future)

We hope you have seen above how you might also open up your institutions to contagious sharing and caring with communal partnering through mentoring and teaching (see Appendix D for an “elevator pitch”; Murphey, Üstündağ-Algın, & Karaaslan, 2022), even with students and their own communities (families and friends) not in your institution. Should you have any questions, please let us know. Our share-care-ship is at the docks and easy to find (author emails and smiles below). 

As teachers and advisors, we see what we have described above as beginning steps to more ownership by students of their programs, research and publications and much more sharing and caring across the world. We can foresee newsletters written and controlled by such student mentorship programs and distributed to other such mentoring groups as “Share And Care Readings” (SACREAD) with procedures, tips, advice, problems and processes. We look forward to readers’, mentees’ and students’ responses, ownership and sharing and caring ideas. 

Addendum

Informational Links on Partnering: 
https://centerforpartnership.org/
https://www.partnerism.org/

Informational Link on COPS BEES Source:
www.mayoclinic.com/nutirition

References for Riane Eisler:
Eisler, R. (1987). The chalice and the blade: Our history, our future. Harper & Row.
Eisler, R. (2000). Tomorrow’s children: A blueprint for partnership education in the 21st century. Westview Press.
Eisler, R. (2002). The power of partnership. New World Library. 
Eisler, R. (2007). The real wealth of nations. Berrett-Koehler Publishers.
Eisler, R. (2021). Caring for people and nature first: Four cornerstones for a successful progressive agenda. In P. Clayton, K. Archie, J. Sachs, & E. Steiner (Eds.), The new possible: Visions of our world beyond crisis (pp. 71–79). Cascade Books.
Eisler, R. & Fry, D. (2019). Nurturing our humanity: How domination and partnership shape our brains, lives, and future. Oxford Press.
Mraz, J. (2008, March 14). I’m yours (official video) . YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkHTsc9PU2A

Notes on the contributors

Pınar Üstündağ-Algın (MA in Foreign Language Teaching, and Learning Advising Certificates from Ankara Yıldırım Beyazıt University and Kanda University of International Studies [KUIS], Japan) is an EFL instructor, learning advisor and student mentorship program supervisor at AYBU with experience as a teaching assistant for the Research Institute for Learner Autonomy Education (RILAE), KUIS, Japan. Her interests include advising and social-emotional pedagogies. 

Hatice Karaaslan (PhD in Cognitive Science from Middle East Technical University) is an EFL instructor, learning advisor, advisor educator and student mentorship program supervisor at AYBU with experience as a guest instructor for the Research Institute for Learner Autonomy Education (RILAE), Kanda University of International Studies, Japan. Her interests include storytelling, social-emotional pedagogies and micro-credentials.

Tim Murphey (MA University of Florida, PhD Université de Neuchâtel, Switzerland), Kanda University of International Studies, semi-retired professor in the Research Institute for Learner Autonomy Education (RILAE), part-time at Wayo Women’s University Graduate School of Human Ecology, juggles while skiing, makes lots of mistakes in order to increase his opera-tunes-it-teas for learning.

References

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Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL). (2021, October 21). Social and emotional learning (SEL) 101: Special edition building connections webinar [webinar]. https://casel.org/events/social-and-emotional-learning-sel-101/ 

Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL). (2022). What is Social and Emotional Learning? https://drc.casel.org/what-is-sel/

Eisler, R. (1987). The chalice and the blade: Our history, our future. Harper & Row.

Eisler, R. (2000). Tomorrow’s children: A blueprint for partnership education in the 21st century. Westview Press. 

Fredrickson B. L., & Branigan, C. (2005). Positive emotions broaden the scope of attention and thought-action repertories. Cognition & Emotion, 19(3), 313–332. https://doi.org/10.1080/02699930441000238

Fukada, Y., Fukuda, T., Falout, J. & Murphey, T. (2011). Increasing motivation with possible selves. In A. Stewart (Ed.), JALT 2010 Conference Proceedings (pp. 337–349). JALT. https://jalt-publications.org/proceedings/articles/1040-increasing-motivation-possible-selves

Hamel, G. & Zanini, M. (2020). Humanocracy: Creating organizations as amazing as the people inside them. Harvard Business Review Press.

Hari, J. (2018). Lost connections: Uncovering the real causes of depression—and the unexpected solutions. Bloomsbury Circus. 

Murphey, T. (2014). Scaffolding, participating, agencing friending and fluencing. In T. Muller, J. Adamson, P. S. Brown, S. Herder (Eds.), Exploring EFL fluency in Asia (pp. 42–58). Palgrave Macmillan. https://doi.org/10.1057/9781137449405_4 

Murphey, T. (2017). Teaching to learn and well-become: Many mini-renaissances. In P. McIntyre, T. Gregerson, S. Mercer (Eds.), Positive psychology in SLA (pp. 324–343). Multilingual Matters. https://doi.org/10.21832/9781783095360-015 

Murphey, T. (2018). Bilingual songlet singing. Journal of Research and Pedagogy, Otemae University & Hiroshima JALT, 4(12), 41–49. https://www.creativityaustralia.org.au/wp-content/uploads/12-MindBrained-Think-Tank-V4i12-Music-Dec-2018-optimized.pdf

Murphey, T. (2021a). Voicing learning. Candlin & Mynard. https://doi.org/10.47908/18 

Murphey, T. (2021b). Ask your students for a change: Using student produced and selected materials (SPSMs) in dialogic pedagogy. The Language Teacher,45(5), 9–16. https://doi.org/10.37546/jalttlt45.5-2 

Murphey, T., Üstündağ-Algın, P., & Karaaslan, H. (2022). Teacher leadership project proposal [Unpublished manuscript].

Murthy, V. (2020). Together: The healing power of human connection in a sometimes lonely world. Harper Collins.

Paul, A. M. (2021). The extended mind: Thinking outside the brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. 

Pilling, D. (2014). Bending adversity: Japan and the art of survival. Allen Lane Penguin.

Porath, C. (2016). Mastering civility: A manifesto for the workplace. Grand Central Publishing. 

Seligman, M. E. P. (2011). Flourish: A visionary new understanding of happiness and well-being. Free Press.

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